Be Kind: That's The Lesson Being Taught At Moraga School

Students at Joaquin Moraga Intermediate School are learning more than math, science and English these days.

They're also learning a valuable life skill -- how to be kind to each other.

Last week, the school launched the iKind program, which enlists pledges from students and recognizes those who perform acts of kindness.

"We were looking for something that would carry on for more than a year," said Principal Joan Danilson. "We wanted something that could be infused in our culture, a practice that would define what Joaquin Moraga is."

The name comes from the popular series of Apple products such as iMac and iPod.

"We were trying to think of something that was profound yet simple," said school counselor Heidi Felt.

The program was launched on Oct. 8 when an assembly was held for the entire school.

Molly Stroud and Lauren Parsekian, the co-founders of "Finding Kind," came and spoke to the students about their organization, which combats bullying and the so-called "mean girl syndrome."

The young woman also showed the Joaquin Moraga students the documentary they made. Posters from the organization and movie have been put up around the campus.

The students filled out Kind Pledges, red cards on which they wrote how they plan to act nicely toward others. Those pledges are now on several walls on campus.

The pledges range from "I won't start rumors" to "I'll be nice to people even if I don't like them" to "I'm going to smile at people I see."

The students also filled out Kind Apologies, blue cards on which they said they were sorry to someone they treated badly. Those cards were given by the students to the ones they offended.

Finally, Kind Cards were given to students and placed in classrooms. Students fill out those yellow cards when they notice an act of kindness and place them in a box in their class. Three cards are drawn randomly each week with the selected students getting prizes.

Felt said the idea is to re-enforce the positive.

"We don't want to tell kids that we caught you being bad. We want to tell them that we caught you being good," said Felt. "We want to point out to kids what they're doing right."

Teachers and administrators have also agreed to treat each other kindly, setting an example for the students. For example, some teachers are looking into the possibility of each of them donating a day off so another employee can have a longer maternity leave.

"That's exactly what we're trying to promote," said Danilson.

Teachers are also starting to integrate kindness into some of their lessons and daily discussions in class. In January, teachers will start infusing kindness into their curriculum on a rotating basis.

Felt and Danilson said they felt the need to institute the program because of the bullying and other mean behavior that can happen in middle school.

"It goes without saying that middle school is the toughest time," said Felt.

They pointed out that bullying isn't restricted to campus. It can follow a student home when mean behavior is acted out on the Internet.

That kind of behavior became national news this week when two Florida middle school students were arrested in connection with the suicide of a classmate who'd been bullied. 

Danilson and Felt are hoping to break a cycle. By teaching adolescents the benefits of kindness, they can create adults who are thoughtful and courteous.

They want to teach youngsters that it's "cool to be kind."

So far, they say it appears to be working. They've noticed an extra degree of politeness from students and discussion of kind acts.

This week, a group of girls even went to Safeway and bought yellow roses, which they handed out to classmates who they'd mistreated.

"I think it's starting to permeate," said Danilson.