There are a lot of numbers getting thrown around this election year. About the only sure figure anyone can agree on is that -- if by some stroke of luck and cosmic reorganization we come together as a people -- there'd be 100 percent of us.
But we seem to have fallen far short of that, with Americans lumping themselves or being lumped into various fractions this election year. There's Mitt Romney's 47 Percenters -- victims happily suckling at the government teat -- or the 99 Percent, the broadly suffering majority paying the bill for the free-spending excesses of those at the top of income distribution in America, the uber-rich One Percent.
Which percent are you? I guess we're 99 Percenters, not out of any shared idealism, though many of their arguments make sense, but because that fraction safely covers our lot in life while we avoid anything that smacks of the stigma of 47 Percent victimization, and because our jaws still drop at the price of milk. One Percenters, we have it on good authority, live in palaces and get their milk from cows with golden udders.
Since we depend on our employment for our incomes I guess that makes us workers, and since we pay far too much in taxes I guess that excludes us from membership in the One Percent. So it's the 99 Percenters for us. Up the proletariat.
Where doth thou lie, Lamorinda? I would imagine mostly with us worker bees, with a healthy smattering of the (hopefully) charitable One Percent. We'll see, as the idea for this little story was sprung this morning by readers eager to sound off online about "The Mitt Tapes" and candidate Romney's broad characterization of half of the country's population.
"Some will see this as a clear window into his true evil soul," one reader penned. "I find his comments remarkably candid and sensible…. I think he should embrace and underscore much of what he said."
Okay, we'll use that opinion as a launching pad for the rest of you. Pick your percent...
NOTE: Before you waste time chafing your bony little fingers pik-pokking us threats of violence and obloquy, we know the video of people commenting on candidate Romney's words came from the Obama-Biden camp. It was chosen solely for its production value and on-screen transcript of candidate Romney's comments. That's it. No favoritism of any candidate implied or intended.